At Brilliant Read Media, it is our constant endeavour to identify and share some of the unique and compelling stories from the startup ecosystem. As part of this, we invited Sunanda Kolhe for an interview with Brilliant Read Media. To say further, Sunanda is a Psychotherapist, Trauma & Attachment-Informed Therapist and Founder of Manushee. Let’s learn more about her background, her inspiring journey so far and her advice for our growing community!
Excerpts from our exclusive interview with Sunanda:
Could you please talk us through your background and your journey?
I am a trauma and attachment-informed therapist with over a decade of experience specializing in treating chronic stress and trauma in women throughout their reproductive lifespan. As a trained Biology of Trauma Professional, I integrate mind-body approaches into my therapeutic practice, helping clients navigate their healing journeys from the inside out.
In January 2024, I founded Manushee, an Integrative Women’s Clinic dedicated to providing holistic mental and physical health support to women. At Manushee, my focus is on addressing the root causes of trauma, stress and anxiety and comorbid psychological and physiological conditions across their reproductive lifespan. We empower clients to reclaim their health, well-being and longevity through individual, personalized, Trauma-informed care.
Before starting Manushee, I spent two years as a Psychotherapist at MindPeers, where I provided therapeutic intervention and support to individuals dealing with a range of mental health challenges.
Prior to this, I worked as a School Psychologist and Counselor for two years, offering counselling services to neuro-divergent children and adolescents in both school and clinical settings.
My role involved conducting psychological assessments, writing reports, advising treatment plans, and providing therapeutic intervention. I helped young individuals overcome emotional challenges, including self-esteem issues, by offering individual and family counselling.
Throughout my career, I have been committed to helping my clients heal from trauma and chronic stress, allowing them to lead healthier, more fulfilling lives.
How did you discover your passion?
As I worked with the increasing number of women facing debilitating mental health concerns early on in their lives, I realized that every woman who has suffered psychological, emotional, mental and physiological stress has been waiting to tell a distinctive and unique narrative. Many times it took a lot of effort for them just to take time out for themselves and acknowledge that they needed help.
Trauma is one of the most stigmatized, underdiagnosed or misdiagnosed, and a deeply neglected condition. It has adverse effects on an individual’s self-image, how they interact with the world and their relationships with others and themselves.
Many times due to cultural factors, women fail to notice that they have trauma. Most importantly, there is a significant gap between those in need of assistance and the trauma-informed therapists who are qualified to provide care in the right manner and sequence.
Drawing from my own and others trauma and attachment healing journey and needs, I found myself extremely driven and passionate to create a space where the right kind of help and guidance is available easily, holistically and safely.
Who do you believe has been the biggest source of motivation in your daily life?
It’d be wrong to say that I have a single source of inspiration. I found my inspiration in the many books that I have read. In fact there are many. One of them who is a source of motivation in my daily life has been individuals like Canadian physician and trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté and Dr Peter Levine. Their profound work on trauma, addiction, and the mind-body connection has deeply shaped my understanding of the mind-body connection and mental health and healing on all levels.
Dr. Maté’s compassionate approach to addressing trauma and his emphasis on how early life experiences shape our health and behaviour have had a lasting impact on both my personal and professional journey. His teachings remind me every day of the importance of looking beyond symptoms to understand the root causes of emotional and physical suffering, and this perspective fuels my passion for helping others heal.
Another source of inspiration are my clients. Their journeys, their stories, their struggles and their uniqueness drives me to understand the divine Feminine more and more. Every client has taught me something and empowered me to accept and understand parts of me that I invalidated and abandoned for a very long time. The more I connected with myself, the more I felt in resonation with them.
What are some of the strategies that you believe have helped you grow as a person?
As a Senior Psychologist and Trauma Specialist, several key strategies have helped me grow both personally and professionally:
Embracing Self-Reflection: Regular self-reflection has been crucial to my growth. It allows me to assess my emotional responses and biases which in turn deepens my empathy and connection with clients. This has helped me grow both in self-awareness and in understanding how trauma impacts others.
Practising Mindfulness and Grounding: Incorporating mindfulness and grounding techniques into my own life has helped me manage stress and stay centred, especially when dealing with intense emotional work. These practices not only support my well-being but also provide me with effective tools to teach clients as they navigate their healing journeys.
Seeking Supervision and Peer Support: In this field, it’s important to recognize that personal growth often comes from collaborative spaces. Engaging in regular supervision and connecting with fellow therapists allows me to gain new perspectives, receive feedback, and continuously refine my therapeutic approach. It has been invaluable to my growth.
Prioritizing Self-Care: Lastly, prioritizing self-care has been a non-negotiable strategy for my own well-being. Working with trauma can be emotionally taxing, and maintaining a balance between my personal and professional life ensures that I can be present for my clients without experiencing burnout.
Discipline, Habit building and consistency: When you sow a new seed, it needs you to show up daily. It needs water, sunlight and nutrients for it to grow into a healthy plant. And that requires discipline to show up daily. Small daily habits lead to big changes.
Slowing it down: Slowly you will get there faster is the new mantra. In this fast-paced life, one is aware of the here and now only when one slows down and becomes more present in the moment.
In your opinion what are the keys to success?
Success for me has never been and will never be about achieving external goals. It will always be about inner growth, staying connected to my set of values, and continuously evolving, both as a person and a professional.
I have these 5 points stuck on a board in my office. Some of the driving principles. For me, they stand as daily reminders.
Self-Awareness: It all begins with a deep understanding of oneself. This has helped me immensely because Therapy is crawling down a deep dark cave and pulling up someone that’s stuck there. One needs to recognize their own strengths, limitations, emotions and triggers to be fully able to make informed, intentional decisions.
Resilience: Trauma therapy is an emotionally demanding field. You are going to get knocked down more times than you asked for. Build a process to quickly adapt, recover from setbacks, and maintain emotional equilibrium for long-term success.
Lifelong Learning: I will never stop learning. Especially in this field, there is no moment when one has ‘arrived’. The field of mental health is evolving so fast and staying open to new ideas, therapies, and approaches is vital. Need to ensure that we stay adaptable, relevant, and capable of offering the best care to our clients.
Collaboration: Success rarely happens in isolation. Working collaboratively with peers, supervisors, and mentors helps expand our perspectives and improve our practices. In trauma work, collaboration fosters an environment where we can both give and receive support, preventing burnout and enriching our expertise.
Purpose and Meaning: For me, helping individuals heal from trauma and reclaim their lives provides a deep sense of fulfilment and aligns with my core values. This not only drives me but also sustains me through difficult times.
What advice would you give to our readers?
My advice is for women, especially those between the ages of 25-55.
– Prioritize your mental and emotional well-being as much as you would your physical health.
– I know you are all busy bees, take a moment to process how we truly feel. Pause and acknowledge your emotions, whether they are feelings of stress, anxiety, or even joy. Trust me, when you give some space to these emotions, you will understand them and manage them better.
– Set boundaries without guilt.
– Seek support early. It’s okay to ask for help. Whether you’re dealing with stress, trauma, or feeling overwhelmed, seeking professional support from a therapist or counsellor is a sign of strength, not weakness.
We are at the end of another week and as we move into the weekend, I wanted to leave something with you to think about.
Our bodies naturally respond to situations in a unique way. For example, you’re sitting in a meeting and the CEO suddenly asks you to explain why last month’s numbers were low, or if a colleague shouts at you over a trivial matter etc, you’ll immediately notice how your body is getting ready to respond to that situation.
Also, you’ll realize that two people might have completely different responses to the same situation. In the face of a threat, one might put their head down and give in to the situation, another might stand their ground and lash out in response.
The reason for this is our reactions make sense in the context of our past experiences. When we’ve been through overwhelming situations, our minds and bodies develop survival strategies to protect us.
Let’s dive a bit deeper into the specific nervous system responses.
They’re automatic, instinctual, and designed to keep us safe in moments of threat. However, if someone is repeatedly exposed to stress or trauma, these survival responses then become ingrained in their daily behaviour.
Let’s look at how these patterns emerge along the fault lines of the nervous system.
Fight Response – Look around in the office for the person who’s always on edge. Even the slightest disagreement with a fellow colleague can drive them over the edge. What follows is raised voices, tense muscles etc. The fight response often comes up when the body senses a threat. It can show up as anger, irritability, or a strong drive to take control of a situation. While the fight response is designed to protect us, it can quickly become the default mode where the nervous system is stuck in overdrive. Over time, this might manifest as frequent arguments and a constant need to be ‘right’.
Flight Response – We all have this one colleague in the office. They’re not part of intense discussions, don’t counter anyone even if they have a different point of view on a matter. The flight response occurs when the nervous system perceives danger but senses that escape is possible. This response can lead to behaviours like avoiding conflict, leaving stressful situations, or constantly staying busy to avoid discomfort. When this response becomes habitual, it can lead to chronic avoidance of difficult emotions or situations, leaving a person feeling like they’re always running, both physically and emotionally.
Freeze Response – The freeze response is when the body shuts down to protect itself. In moments of overwhelm, the nervous system may numb out. This can become a pattern of dissociation or paralysis over time, where emotions and actions feel frozen. When it becomes the norm, it can leave a person feeling disconnected from themselves and others.
Submit Response – Submission is often less talked about but is a survival response where we surrender to what feels like an inevitable threat and the nervous system may default to appeasing others or giving up autonomy to stay safe. This response can lead to people-pleasing behaviours or constantly putting others needs ahead of yours. While submitting might have helped in dangerous situations, when this response gets stuck, it can result in chronic self-sacrifice or a loss of personal boundaries.
Seek Support Response – The seek support response is the body’s way of reaching out for help when we feel vulnerable. In a healthy, regulated system, it allows us to turn to others for comfort and safety. However, when the nervous system struggles to regulate, seeking support can become a pattern of dependency, constantly needing external validation to feel safe. While it’s natural to want support during stress, when the nervous system is dysregulated, this response can lead to an overwhelming need for others to provide a sense of safety.
Feeling stressed? – Between the never-ending cycle of negativity on social media, 24/7 News, Economic anxiety, and Election season, well, there’s a lot going on right now. This puts you in a state of chronic stress and chronic stress can disrupt your sleep, sap your energy, increase your risk for illness, and it can aggravate gut permeability (leaky gut).
Fortunately, there are a few things we can do to reduce stress, which can help you feel great and even improve gut health, too. The best stress-buster out there is getting regular exercise.
Exercise reduces stress hormones and stimulates production of endorphins (feel-good hormones), helping you feel calm and relaxed. Even as little as 15 minutes of aerobic exercise can reduce stress.
Another safe supplement we can take in case you are considering supplements is with Ashwagandha.
Ashwagandha is a generally safe adaptogenic herb that’s been used for centuries to help people cope with stress in a healthy way.
Modern studies confirm what ancient healers have known for centuries: ashwagandha works wonders to help address the negative effects of too much stress.
In a recent clinical trial, scientists gathered a group of adults with a history of chronic stress. Half of these participants were given 1200mg of ashwagandha for 60 days; the other half were given a placebo.
At the end of the study, the scientists were stunned by the results.
The folks taking a placebo were just as stressed out as ever. But the men and women taking ashwagandha reported feeling significantly less stress and anxiety.
What’s more, blood tests revealed that these men and women also had dramatically lower levels of cortisol (the “stress hormone”) coursing in their veins than the people who only took a placebo.
This is not a post promoting any particular brand of Ashwagandha. I would suggest doing some further reading on your own before you go for it.
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